The list is long on things to avoid. Remember always when you wipe your car a sandpaper 'effect' is going on, no matter how careful you are.
One thing that will greatly reduce the swirl scratches is to wipe in a straight line when washing and drying your car. Completely wet the area of the car you are washing with clean water (and car wash solvent if necessary). Do not use a sponge; thick terry towels only. Use a thick cotten towel to dry, and turn often to reduce rubbing, or dragging, the dirt into the finish. Keep a waxed finish on the car to reduce drying efforts.
Obvious things like orbital buffers used improperly (even pros mess this up) and thin towels/rags used for cleaning can cause these spider web scratches after one event.
Over time it's going to happen, and dark colors are the worst to show. All we can do is give some thought to the event of wiping our cars.
Yeah I am already starting to see a few little swirls you speak of. Fortunatly it seems they only realy stand out to me as many of my frinds cant stopspeaking of the metallic finisha and how great it looks. It does seem the finish on the charger has a really deep metalic finish. this might keep the swirl marks from showing up like you typically see on a standard black finished car. obviously it seems that taking a car through a car wash is the worst idea and it you can afford it take it to a well established show to keep it detailed. I had a paint sealant done the other day and it helped with these swirl marks. so maybe give that a try as well.